birthdays of our loved ones

March 29th was my deceased brother Ken's birthday. I wished him the happiest of celebrations up in heaven. In my idea of heaven, a party is still the way to acknowledge the day. I see our loved ones surrounding him and lots of candles on top of a cake.

Yesterday was my living brother Ray's birthday. Today is my living sister Theresa's birthday. What is sad is that I still feel closer to my sibling that is deceased than I do to the two (mentioned) that are alive. The one who is gone courageously fought cancer. The two with April birthdays fight self imposed limits.

I come from a family of eight children. We were raised traditionally with both parents in the home. Our hometown industries centered on open-pit mining, mainly copper and minerals. The winters were hard, the unions were tough and everyone was strong and good looking. (Apologies to Garrison Keillor - I could not resist.)

The posts spread over social media today tell me that it is "Siblings Day". The cynical side of me sighed at the fact that marketers have made up another holiday. I will not rush out and shop so that I can tell my brothers and sisters that they are special. I doubt that any of them will acknowledge it either. That makes me sad. I am not a "hallmark card for every occasion kinda girl" but the distance and misunderstandings between us bother me.

I am not optomistic concerning reconciliation with either one of these siblings. This is not pessimism, I am just a realist. Grudges from years past came through in the last conversations with these two-- and they took me by surprise. I know that I am as stubborn as they are. I wonder if they hurt about it as much as I do? 

Our parents were the "glue" to our family, especially my dad. That job was passed down to sibling #4, but she has passed away also. There are six of us left and at best we are polite to each other. Maybe we are all afraid that we may splinter more?

I will admit that today my hormones are playing a part in this writing. I pray that my children can stay closer than I have with my siblings.

This is another way in nature that dogs are smarter than us.

On Sunday past, four of Violet's pups got together for a play date. This was the first time since going to their new homes almost three months ago. The boys remembered each other. Such happiness to see each other! Simple pleasure of each other's company. There were no worries about the disagreement with Obamacare costs, number of hospital visits, or refusals to give out cell phone numbers. The boys just accept each other where they are at. How evolved is that?